Sep. 13th 2023
So, parents are challenging. I know, who didn’t already know that?
But you know when they’re the most challenging? When you're the oldest daughter, the firstborn. Especially, when it comes time for you to want your independence, at the time and place in your life where you actually desperately need it. I am the oldest daughter and firstborn child in my family, I am 18. Now, I know that's not a full-fledged adult, sure. And I've got tons of learning to do, yes. But decision-making, in my life, has been absolutely polluted by my parents, because of this very reason. Or at least, that's how it feels.
For 3 full months, before and after I turned 18, they did nothing but remind me that I “wasn't an adult” and “not to get any ideas” because I was still a child. Which, felt exactly as it seemed; suffocating and restricting, and condescending. At a time when I had finally felt free, I'd had a job, gotten my GED, and been driving on my own, I was ready to get out and explore and try new things and meet new people, but they completely shut down my autonomy.
Now, disclaimer, they aren't bad parents by any extent of the imagination. I have a good life because of them, I've never gone without meals, clothes, schooling opportunities. And I don't necessarily expect to have the ability to come and go from their house as I please without notice or care as if I owe them no gratitude for everything they've done for me.
Without delving too deeply into some of my future talking points, I will say I am beyond grateful for everything they've done for me and continue to do for me. However, after yet another lecture about how something needs to be done with my life, something new and bold and something that is going to do more for me than a minimum wage 9-5, I decided to document my life, my journey into adulthood.
That Oldest Daughter is for the young women who have or still do, struggle under the pressure. Whether you have younger siblings you helped raise, daddy issues (because don't we all), lots of chores, high expectations pressed upon you, mommy issues (because we have those too), and a lot of goals for life, or maybe no ideas for what you'll do.
Here will be my random thoughts, funny stories, pictures of my dog, recaps of the endless parental lectures, family events, life events, TMI moments, and more pictures in case you get tired of reading.
For whoever will read, for whoever wants the entertainment of another person's misery, for whoever needs to know they're not alone, for all the oldest sisters and daughters who found it hard to be the oldest, to be the firstborn. This is for you. Welcome to That Oldest Daughter Life.
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